My Andrewland Diary - January 2016

January 1, 2016, Friday

I decided to start keeping a diary. I will record all my innermost hopes and dreams. I will record ideas to make the world a better place. I will record ways to make the people I love happier.

Who am I kidding. I am going to plot and plan to get richer, and to make my enemies weep and gnash their teeth.

January 4, 2016, Monday

I got that Road Kill Cookbook I wanted for Christmas. On the way to work I noticed some ingredients laying on the side of the road. I am going to get them suckers on the way home.

January 5, 2016, Tuesday

When I get home from work, that stew in the crock pot should be just about ready. Can't figure out why wife keeps turning green when I make her taste it.

January 8, 2016, Friday

I finally finished my vaporizing car head lamps. It made the commute today so much easier and faster.

January 9, 2016, Saturday

I didn't win that 800 million dollar Power Ball lottery. But if I had, I know exactly what I would have done with the money.

January 11, 2016, Monday

My neighbor Bob and I recently made an agreement to watch out for each other. We aren’t sure why, but so many of our neighbors have died under mysterious circumstances these past few years, that we are almost quaking in our boots.

Each time a neighbor has given up the ghost, there has been a police investigation and all that. Such a huge bother, and it interferes with my bowling league.

To help eliminate all that mess and aggravation, I have arranged for Bob’s inevitable autopsy to be done pre-mortem instead of the usual post-mortem. I know he will be glad that I am being so proactive in watching out for him.

January 13, 2016, Wednesday

Went to the museum of fine arts today. Picked up a nice Matisse when no one was looking. It is going to look real good over my fireplace, right next to my Elvis on black velvet.

January 15, 2016, Friday

My dogs are bored. Time to go round up another stranger to chain up in the back yard for the dogs to bark at. I sleep so much better since the dogs get their barking out of the way during the day.

January 16, 2016, Saturday

Started a new book. "Cooking Friends and Neighbors"

January 18, 2016, Monday

Today I decided to retire my Mac computer in favor of a Linux computer. I do Unix for a living, and Linux is finally ready for the desktop. After some research, I decided to try Linux Mint, Fedora and Suse. After trying Mint, I decided I don't need to look any further. Check out my Linux page for details and progress. The page should be up in a couple of days.

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